It is easy to reflect over the journey so far and forget the values deep down inside which drove me from as far back as I can remember.
I sent a card recently to Uncle John. He is not a real Uncle. We all have them, they are friends of the family who are so close they earn that title of being brought into the family. Well Uncle John brought me into this world. He was the first person to lay hands on me as he was our family doctor and life long friend. For a number of years he has not been well. After an embolism which led to a stroke John was left unable to speak. A particularly cruel blow to one of the greatest communicators and kindest men I know.
In the card I wrote, Thank you for believing in me and giving me hope and a reason to strive for greatness. Once on a holiday in the Isle of Sky, I was around 13 years old. I turned around to see that my father, John and his 2 sons both in their late teens had disappeared to the local pub. I was particularly put out that they had left me with the ladies. I asked the direction of the pub and as I ran down the drive I heard someone shout "but it's 6 miles away!"
It is amazing what you can achieve when you are focussed. I had never run like that before with a purpose, a destination and point to prove. It was a hot day and I arrived shortly after the men had sat down, they were about a third of their way into their pints.
They were taken aback when I calmly pulled up a chair beside them. They were convinced I'd got a lift at first.
When it was time to leave even though I was desperately in need of a lift home. I was tired and beginning to ache, one of the men said, "so, I suppose you will be running back then too?"
"Of course I answered" as if there was simply no other option possible.
I set off down the road, jumped over a fence as I now knew the way and headed across the fields.
The pub was called the Flodygary I will never forget the winding roads and the scenery. I grew up that holiday.
I once over heard Uncle john defending me say "that boy Ken will overcome anything and achieve whatever he sets his mind on."
This was to become a driving force which still burns deep inside my soul.
That holiday the gents drove to the pub every day. I ran the journey there and back.
I tell you this story because it is important for me to share with you the reasons why I am the way I am. There is no point me simply telling you this is the way. It is the reasons why that drive us. A light is very useful in the dark, but if you don't know where the switch is, you are going to have problems.
Pride is a big driver for me. I take pride in my heritage and ancestry. People before me have made it possible for me to be here and I am not going to let them down or the people that follow long after I am gone. I am not sure why? I have just set a standard and I am not going to slip below it. I take pride in that standard.
Passion is another important value that I hold dear. It is the passion in which I undertake any job or responsibility that makes me do it to the best of my ability. With Passion comes Belief. If you doubt in your ability, you will fail. Sadly in today's society we are taught how to temper our belief, so that if we fail, we are prepared. Today in schools you hear stories of removing sports day and competition. This is ludicrous for a number of reasons.
Schools need to bring out the best in everyone. They traditionally value and measure academically and elevate people who are good at passing exams. Sadly if you are not great at the academic side you can go through your school life feeling a bit of a failure. Yet how many of those academic kids go on to be huge successes in business. Not half as many as the ones who flopped at school.
Also if you remove the sport and competitive element, you also take subjects that less academic kids can excel at away - just because some of the clever kids don't want to break into a sweat. Madness.
Show me a kid who doesn't want to compete in any walk of life. Every child be it in maths or athletics has a point to prove with a friend in the desk next to them. This needs to be encouraged.
So I suppose this leads me into 'Competitive'. Now I dont think I am competitive. But if you ask anyone who knows me they'd say I am fiercely competitive.
However there is a caveat. I don't mind losing. Now I know you might think well you can't be competitive then. Wrong, I am able to compete on court and I will never give up, not until the very last point is played. But if I am beaten, then I am beaten. It will be painful, but I know I will have given my all.
Which leads nicely into Honest. If you are honest, you are able to reflect and deal with anything. You will never need to look over your shoulder and you will develop far faster. Your honest answers to yourself will accelerate your development as an individual.
When you are beaten, you are beaten for a reason. Dust yourself down, pick up the pieces and most of all, learn from it! You wont be beaten again.
My values not only define me but they also help me to find like minded friends and ultimately family. If you want to learn more about values, how to identify your own and how to use values to find your perfect girlfriend, boyfriend, husband and wife. I have a very good technique which works. It is useful even if you are married as you can use it to find out just how well matched you are and in what areas.